Upon reflection on hindsight, I came to realise the mechanics of our interaction in our relationship.
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Most of all, I had forgotten how to separate my energetic, emotional and physical boundaries with myself. I had forgotten to draw a healthy emotional and energetic boundary in our relationship. I felt completely responsible for what he was going through. I felt a need to be his savior, his therapist - everything, but his girlfriend (which eventually led to the breakup but, we shall leave this story to another time). I took his emotions as mine, perhaps even amplifying it. It was then I was aware of my codependency traits towards him for I was very reactive towards every little thing in his life, even those I did not understand.
Each time something happened in his life or in our relationship, I fell terribly ill. My previous partner and I were very connected and he was going through a difficult phase in his life. One of the biggest ah-ha for me happened when I was dating an ex of mine in 2019. It was only in 2019 when I finally began to assess and curate my energetic intake and output with others, my environment and undertaken the path of true self-care conditioning. It was only in 2019 that I finally acknowledged and recognised that I had poor energetic boundaries with myself and others. I always assumed I was someone with strong boundaries, but I was so, so wrong. It started with absorbing and absorbing everything - from emotions to thought patterns, to expectations, to falsehoods and assuming them as mine. Rather, tuning into people, situations, locations, conversations, in an energetic sense. From the chair you are sitting on, to the person sitting across the train, to the person you sleep with every night, to the moment you step into a shopping mall or crowded area - everything is frequency.Īs someone who identifies herself as an intuitive and an empath, I have spent the last 6 years cultivating and tuning in beyond the peripheral lens of the physical.
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